Winter.

one of my favorite seasons. maybe it was because I was born in it. maybe it’s due to the wonderful snow that sometimes seems so magical. who knows? :)

As I was riding the train, even with the billowing winds, the train had blocked it off. As my train passed on the express line, I watched the snow fall - seemingly so peacefully as I read my book - Coraline. I looked up and out the window; it really looked like a snow falling delicately in a snow globe. It felt like I was a part of a big one - but it kind of sent chills down my spine. If you’ve seen or read Coraline, you’d understand. But at that moment, I smiled at the peacefulness of everything. For once, my brain, heart and mind were at peace. even if it’s just for the moment.

In Seasons of Love, it was the ending two episodes today. The very last had some very prominent quotes that I loved. And two of my favorite people in it. Kenneth Ma & Myolie WU. <3

episode 19.

“Actually, the person I’ve asked you to help me detect is you. Did your father really go to “water star”? It seems like it’s real but at the same time, it seems fake. So the story your mom told you, is it real then? It seems real but it also seems fake. But the truth? It is for you to discover because it’s important for you to know your family/closest. It also affects your lifestyle. Depending on if you want the “truth” or “falseness”, you can even lie to yourself that this world is beautiful or you can decide to REALLY BELIEVE this world is beautiful.” - Myolie

“Why’d you do this?” - Kenneth

“Because I’m a historian. I just want to guide you through your past/history…most importantly, we have to find out the real truth, and not any made up history.” - Myolie

“My mom’s dead. My father has dementia. Where can I find the truth out?” - Kenneth

“Sometimes, the real truth from your past, is buried deep in your heart. We need to discover it ourselves. We need to face our own conscience” - Myolie

I wonder when will it be a time, where I need to rediscover who I am. ‘cause after these past few years, I realize who I am a little more. I am a person who loves my family dearly. Once, it was broken. Now, it’s fixed. But if there ever comes a time for me to want to open a family business, will I allow myself to do it when it caused me so much pain before as a child? Or will I face it bravely, like the girl who faced her past bravely with her ex by asking him the question that knows will break her heart? Right now, I don’t know.

episode 20.

Kenneth: “Today’s most advanced technology, is the spaceship. Once it’s in the sky, it can bring people to space. But 20 somewhat years ago, there was a man, he has to use the most primitive technology - his legs - to bring his daughter to school. Don’t think of bringing his daughter to school as a simple task. Actually, this man has to walk many flights of stairs; everyday, he has to go up and down continuously and when it rains, he has to carry his daughter so she can avoid the water. Every step is difficult. To today, this man’s body, has an increasing amount of problems. When it gets to windy or rainy, both his legs would hurt and no pain medication can stop it. He has one ear, that can only hear about 20%. But this is because in the past, even in the storm, he wants to find the daughter that ran away. The rain went into the ears and eventually became an infection. After finding his daughter, so he can give the best to his daughter, including time and money, so he couldn’t even part with his money to see the doctor. Even though this man has so many problems, he never showed any of it in front of his daughter. Do you know why? It’s not because he is “manly”. It’s because he doesn’t want his daughter to worry. I remember, when you teach your students, you tell them to look at it with their own eyes, use their heart to feel it. If this is your motto, you will find this man, is a living artifact. Can you look closer? To care for someone you should care for? I swear, you will find this man more priceless than any artifact”

Even though that was long and hard to translate, I did it. It held so much meaning to me because it reminded me of my own father. Even though he never had to do those painstakingly challenging things for me, my father brought me to school every day. He held my bookbag and even though I was short, he still walked just as fast. I saw him as the man who wouldn’t yell at me if I had a bad grade. Instead, he cared for me and told me to do better next time. It was due to that, that I would stay up just to see him come home(especially when I had a bad grade LOL). Today, I see him as the man who has aged with an increasing amount of problems. He continually struggles so I can make it through college. He continues to work hard for me.

This semester + 3 more hard years, and I can finally make this man proud. I will not let you down dad.

Myolie

“When something you want finally happens in front of you, and that feeling, is never what you imagined, will you ask yourself, what is it that you stubbornly hold on to? Is it a person? Or is it a desire that you bury deep in your heart? Did you let the desire get the better of you or is it you who is unwilling to let go to continue feeling this way? Using that to drug yourself? One person’s perspective, sometimes, with time and environment will change. Just like this guitar, though it was once lost, it didn’t go back to its owner. At this point, the owner’s perspective had changed and the guitar is nothing more than an extra luggage. For some, its easy to forget their story and for some, it takes a long time to forget. So what about me? There are some who choose a new direction to continue their story, and some stubbornly continue on the same path. If someone easily gives up, does that mean the person has no will? Or is not giving up because someone is too stubborn? Life is like a story. There are twists and turns. What surprises are there? How good is it? It requires us to walk, step by step, to figure it out. Until the end, the ending, no one will know”

haha, I think that was the worst translation yet. I need to work on my chinese to english translations! I see how subbing works now. Gosh, so much work.

Anyway, what this main character went through, I cannot say I understand completely. In fact, my love probably wasn’t as deep. But, what she says is true. When I love someone, it’s hard to let go. But right now, I don’t know is it him that was hard to let go or was it our memories and feelings that I never want to fade. Perhaps it’s a bit of both because I don’t have much experience aside from him but in this past 1.5 years without him, my perspective is slowly changing. Even though I still want to cling onto these precious memories, it’s probably silly of me to hold on to nothing. Which brought me to an ultimatum with him right at the start of this semester. It hurt but maybe, it’s time to go in a new direction.

heiwajima:

can we skip school and university and go to the part where i become a princess

(Source: rurihijiribe, via x3haha)

who are you? but aside from that, I’m living and well. thank you.

why you make me fall for you even more?! </3

“in actuality, the most mysterious part of being human and our interactions is that even after we have met, we won’t know when is the last time we’d meet”

- Myolie Wu, from Seasons of Love/ episode 17. Season: Winter.

it’s actually translated by me from cantonese. I don’t know if it’s exactly correct but I really liked those lines. ♥

this is kind of hard since the films I watch have very good protagonists female leads.

but if I had to pick…Chihiro from Spirited Away because I watched that movie the most. Plus, I love her growth in the movie. She was a spoiled and can’t really do anything right but by the end, she was courageous.

go Chihiro ♥♥

http://axfjeg.bay.livefilestore.com/y1pFcEuUelTkvmNJTBUErZTNPjcZxumcOMphdEPiPDNlIDpaJiEMbt-TIhsobkRYRFPWofsnya13VU

lol THAT ALWAYS MAKES ME LAUGH XD